ITs hard, But you have to accept

"She learned about accepting things through accepting things."-- Wood Harris

I think this is what I need to do. I need to accept that the relationship with the father is over. And I need to accept that is a good thing.

I can't comment on whether he ever loved me or not. I can't comment on whether he ever loved his daughter or not.

But, I can comment on the fact that I have to move on from there and accept things for what they are.

This is what they are. I have to accept that. I can't make him care and you know do I really want him to care. Or do I just need someone to care. I don't know.

What I do know if that for the sake of my child, I need to accept things. Talking to him sent me into a manic state and it turned into a manic episode.

So, I need to accept things for what they are. This is what it is. I need to accept it.

How many times can somebody show you something before you accept it. I feel as if I have been shown so many times that certain people don't care about me. If I can accept that it wont hurt as bad.

I'm doing okay, but, I could feel better. I need to proud of myself for staying "clean" through my episode. But, this rush of sadness is preventing that from happening.

So, today I am just going to focus on accepting.